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2018 Los Angeles Rams Roster Preview: LS Jake McQuaide, soul of America

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In these days of extreme partisanship, only one man can unite America...

Los Angeles Rams LS Jake McQuaide before a game against the Dallas Cowboys in Week 1 of the preseason, August 12, 2017.
Los Angeles Rams LS Jake McQuaide before a game against the Dallas Cowboys in Week 1 of the preseason, August 12, 2017.
Photo by Sean M. Haffey/Getty Images

2015:

Explosions behind, glory ahead. McQuaide breathes the fires of long snapping and spits out an inner strength that consumes the position, the St. Louis Rams, American football and all of human sport.

Jake McQuaide is only long snapping and pain.

2016:

Los Angeles Rams long snapper Jake McQuaide might be the best long snapper in the history of the NFL. He may be the best football player in the history of the NFL. And yes...he may be the greatest human to have ever lived.

2017:

This isn’t entirely accurate. McQuaide doesn’t make the 53-man roster. McQuaide makes a 1-man roster and everyone else makes the 52-man roster.

Roster battle

Don’t blaspheme.

Expectations

I will cede this section to our 16th President, Abraham Lincoln:

It is to deny, what the history of the world tells us is true, to suppose that men of ambition and talents will not continue to spring up amongst us. And, when they do, they will as naturally seek the gratification of their ruling passion, as others have so done before them. The question then, is, can that gratification be found in supporting and maintaining an edifice that has been erected by others? Most certainly it cannot.

Chances of making the final roster (USA/10)

God bless you, Jake McQuaide.

God bless you.