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LA Rams Hypothetical Thursday Injury Report For QB Jared Goff Debut Against Miami Dolphins

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Let’s waste some time.

Los Angeles Rams CB Lamarcus Joyner
Los Angeles Rams CB Lamarcus Joyner
Tim Fuller-USA TODAY Sports

Time for your weekly hypothetical Thursday injury report, courtesy of the Los Angeles Rams.

This week, we started with a quintet laid out as unable to participate. After a couple hypothetical surgeries and some hypothetical accelerated rehabilitation treatments, today’s hypothetical practice saw a wild hypothetical that nobody could have hypothetically seen coming:

Los Angeles Rams

Name POS Injury Wed. Status Thu. Status
Tim Barnes C Foot DNP DNP
Lamarcus Joyner CB Ankle DNP DNP
Robert Quinn DE Illness DNP DNP
Eugene Sims DE Concussion DNP DNP
Nelson Spruce WR Calf DNP DNP

Amazing. The hypothetical work the training team was hypothetically capable of going into today looks hypothetically impressive given today’s hypothetical report.

It’s so hypothetically great to be a fan of this team.

Here’s the Miami Dolphins’ side of the report:

New York Jets

Name POS Injury Wed. Status Thu. Status
Mike Hull LB Knee Full Full
Anthony Steen C/G Neck Full Full
Jermon Bushrod G/T Shoulder Limited Limited
Jarvis Landry WR Shoulder Limited Limited
Kenny Stills WR Calf Limited Limited
Isa Abdul-Quddus S Ankle Limited Limited
Jason Jones DE Knee DNP Limited
Mike Pouncey C Hip Limited DNP
Branden Albert T Wrist DNP DNP
Xavien Howard CB Knee DNP DNP
Jelani Jenkins LB Knee/Hand DNP DNP
Mario Williams DE Ankle DNP DNP

The Mike Pouncey change is worth keeping track of. The Dolphins’ line is, in general, susceptible. Should Pouncey be unable to go along with LT Branden Albert, that could be a major factor for the game in general, especially with Rams rookie franchise QB Jared Goff making his NFL debut.

Now that the Rams have wasted all of our time, let’s watch some Thursday Night Football and prepare ourselves for tomorrow’s injury report which will actually be of some value.