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The Ayatollah Scottmah Salmon has declared a jihad on a simple, kind, inordinately handsome writer from New Mexico, er, uh...I mean Brazil. I'm in Brazil I swear!
"Scottmah" has set the East Coast hoards of Jets fans on me with his article: "Douglas Morrison: Wanted Dead or Alive" just because I mentioned his fondness for pants-less travel on the Subway... He's asking his gang in green to come up with a tagline for me should the Jets win this Sunday against the Rams. What he doesn't know is that my millions, thousands, hundreds... OK, four loyal readers will rush to my defense, or at the very least hide me. They'd NEVER go to GGN and help him, that's for damn sure... Why are you laughing?
Whatever happens, just know I'll never be taken alive!