The Shortest Winter, Act II, Part 2

Andrew Weber-USA TODAY Sports

In this epic saga chronicling the Rams journey through the wilderness of winlessness, we approach Sam Bradford's perilous journey into the bowels of time...

In Act I, we saw Stan Kroenke, aka the Kroanake, and willing sidekick Kevin Demoff fire their general manager and head coach. In the first part of Act 2, we learn that Kroenke has built a time machine and is sending Sam Bradford back in time to change the present and make things right...for the Rams, at least...

ACT II

Scene 2 (cont.)

INT. SWISS TIME TRAVEL LAB

BRADFORD is seated inside the time machine in the middle of the laboratory inside the Swiss arm of Kroenke Industries for as everyone knows, the Swiss are the industry leaders in time travel. He's tightening a five-point harness, surrounded by a constellation of blinking lights, meters, gauges, levers and various controls most of which he is clueless as how to operate. Knowledge is not his goal here. He's been given a mission: go back in time and bend the path of the present to install Jeff Fisher as the new coach of the St. Louis Rams. He pulls out the operator's manual from the glove compartment and flips to the section on the start-up sequence, but is interrupted by a voice inside his helmet.

Kroenke1_thumb_medium (KROENKE): Sam, can you hear me?

Bradfordspecs1_medium (BRADFORD: Loud and clear, sir.

Demoff_kevin_medium_medium (DEMOFF): Sam, the test results we got back from the folks at Motorola confirm the headset inside your helmet should work across all temporal planes. We'll be in constant communication with you.

Bradfordspecs1_medium : Sounds good. I've activated the dystronic insulator. The microcharger is at 22 tetras. I've lowered the combination compression unit to 3. And now I am engaging the biocrypsulator to reverse aspiltophic flow through the deoxidiser. I think it's ready for takeoff.

Kroenke1_thumb_mediumSee? It's as simple as blowing your nose.

Bradfordspecs1_medium : Alright sir. According to the mission brief, you want me to go back to February of 2011 right after Coach Fisher was fired from the Titans and plant the seed in his head that he needs to come coach the Rams.

Kroenke1_thumb_mediumThat's right Sam. No more first-time head coaches. I want someone with experience that isn't afraid to take on some head cases. I want someone that's going to have the boys fired up on Sundays. Sam...

Bradfordspecs1_medium : Yes sir?

Kroenke1_thumb_mediumGo get me Jeff Fisher.

BRADFORD flips the switch on the neutronic hydrofibrilator and the machine begins humming. A noise coming from the back of the pod continues to rise in pitch until it crescendos. The pod is ready.

Bradfordspecs1_medium : Well, here goes nothing.

Kroenke1_thumb_mediumNo, Sam. Here goes everything.

BRADFORD decouples the continuance hinge and instantly the pod disappears.

ACT II

Scene 3

EXT. PARK

Bradfordspecs1_medium : Alright sir, I've landed. Looks like we hit the mark too. (Looks out the visual entry portal or "window") Right in the middle of Darby Park.

Kroenke1_thumb_mediumThat's great, Sam. Remember. Fisher should be with his family northwest of there in Woodland Hills. You've got a map of Los Angeles in the glove compartment.

Bradfordspecs1_medium : Great idea by the Swiss to include a glove compartment in this thing.

Kroenke1_thumb_mediumIt absolutely was. That's why they're the industry leaders in time travel.

Bradfordspecs1_medium : Okay. I'm going to disembark now.

Demoff_kevin_medium_medium: Be careful, Sam. The movement between temporal dimensions may have affected your balance and your legs may have atrophied some. I'm running diagnostics on you now...Breathing's good. Blood levels are fine. Genitals appear to be in tip top shape.

Bradfordspecs1_medium : Hey...

Demoff_kevin_medium_medium: SAM, WE CAN'T TAKE ANY CHANCES! YOU'VE GOT TO HAVE EVERYTHING AT YOUR DISPOSAL!

Bradfordspecs1_medium : Sorry. Right. Okay, I'm going to open the main multi-threshold protector flapscreen.

BRADFORD opens what most people would just call a door and is greeted by the mild air. It's the height of winter, and L.A. is blanketed by unusually frigid temperatures. Right now, it's an arctic 61°. He steps out of the pod.

Demoff_kevin_medium_medium: What's wrong, Sam? Your heart rate just rose and your neurosensors are creeping up too.

Bradfordspecs1_medium : (Bradford feels like something is wrong) I feel like something is wrong.

Kroenke1_thumb_mediumWhat do you mean, Sam?

Bradfordspecs1_medium : There's just...wait a second...

BRADFORD is slowly approaching Pincay Dr. He notices a billboard for a Justin Bieber concert...in the summer of 2014.

Bradfordspecs1_medium : Something happened. I don't know what's going wrong but this isn't right.

Demoff_kevin_medium_medium: Sir, I'm detecting a change in the reading of the non-fluctuating temporal assistance mechanism.

Kroenke1_thumb_mediumWhat do you mean, Kevin.

Demoff_kevin_medium_medium: Sir, he's where he's supposed to be...but...he's not when he's supposed to be.

Kroenke1_thumb_mediumBradfordspecs1_mediumWHAT?!

Demoff_kevin_medium_medium: I don't know what happened. I'm trying to figure it out.

Bradfordspecs1_medium : When am I?

Demoff_kevin_medium_medium: I can't tell. The initial reading is stuck between the 1960s and the early 1850s. Do you see any crinolines or bell bottoms?

Bradfordspecs1_medium : Hold on...OH MY GOD

Kroenke1_thumb_mediumWhat is it Sam?

The camera starts with a close up on BRADFORD, eyes wide, mouth agape. We pan around to an OTS shot and see he's staring at a massive structure with a sign above that reads "Google Maps Stadium...Home of the Los Angeles Rams Since 2013"

Demoff_kevin_medium_medium: Sir, the reading's finished. I know when Sam is. He's in 2014.

Bradfordspecs1_medium : That doesn't make any sense. The Rams are in St. Louis.

Kroenke1_thumb_mediumNot in your 2014 they're not. Sam, somehow when you crossed the temporal plane, you also crossed a dimensional one. You need to be careful. The rules and norms that govern our world, our time may not apply. Things might be totally different there.

Bradfordspecs1_medium : Hold on. I see some guys coming over. They look friendly.

Four men are approaching BRADFORD. He can't quite make them out; the sun's glaring, the four man have hair obscuring parts of their faces, and BRADFORD's eyes still haven't fully adjusted to the time travel. The four men near.

Sanchez_thumb_medium (SANCHEZ): Sup bro.

Leinart_thumb_medium (LEINART): Hey, sup bro.

Palmer_thumb_medium (PALMER): Wassup bro.

Barkley_thumb_medium (BARKLEY): Bro.

Demoff_kevin_medium_medium: GET BACK TO THE POD, SAM. NOW.

Kroenke1_thumb_mediumSam, you have to hurry. You have to get away from them.

Bradfordspecs1_medium : I don't get it. They seem pretty cool.

Kroenke1_thumb_medium : That's the problem, Sam. They're too cool. Too cool for school. Think about it. Peyton Manning. Tom Brady. Totally uncool. I can't have my franchise QB bringing back any cool points to this world that he didn't leave with.

Bradfordspecs1_medium : I guess. They just seem chill.

Kroenke1_thumb_medium : What? They seem..."chill?" Sam, you're running out of time. Hurry. It's starting to sink in.

Bradfordspecs1_medium : No probs, bro.

Kroenke1_thumb_medium : Kevin, it's start to oversaturate. We have to do something.

Demoff_kevin_medium_medium: I'm trying sir. I think we can get him back and get rid of the cool he's been infected with. He may have to hang out with Joe Flacco and Matt Ryan when he gets back.

Kroenke1_thumb_medium : Right. Sam, are you ready?

BRADFORD is back in the pod. The main multi-threshold protector flapscreen is closed.

Bradfordspecs1_medium : Bro, been ready. Let's get me back on a Friday. Going get smashed with Jo-Lonn.

Kroenke1_thumb_medium : Go, Sam. Go.

BRADFORD decouples the continuance hinge and the pod disappears.

ACT II

Scene 4

INT. SWISS TIME TRAVEL LAB

KROENKE is sitting in a chair at the end of a long table.

Kroenke1_thumb_medium : Gentlemen, thank you for coming. As you know, we recently sent Sam on a fact-finding mission relating to our next head coach.

Demoff_kevin_medium_medium: It's been a, um, difficult situation. Which is why Mr. Kroenke wanted some of you here.

Softli_thumb_medium (SOFTLI): Glad to be here.

Lesmiles_thumbnail_medium (MILES): Help is something I can provide as provided.

Irvin_thumb_medium (IRVIN): I AM HERE TO ASSIST IN ANYWAY I CAN. THAT. IS WHAT MAKES. A TEAM.

Bayless_thumb_medium (BAYLESS): The 2014 Los Angeles Rams of another dimension could beat the 1985 Chicago Bears. Fact.

Demoff_kevin_medium_medium: Wait...how do you know about the other Rams?

Bayless_thumb_medium (PROTOBAYLESS): BECAUSE I AM THE PROTOBAYLESS, MERGER OF WORLDS. I CAN SEE THE PAST, THE THEN. I CAN SEE THE FUTURE, THE WILL BE. I CAN CROSS TIME AND STRETCH MEMORY. I AM THE DIMENSIONAL PLANE.

Softli_thumb_medium : That's some good wordwork.

Lesmiles_thumbnail_medium : I'm not sure you know that what you're saying, to understand, is both dangerous and highly risky for a man to behold unto himself. Because whether the light switch is on in every room or not, I'm not certain, but I can tell you that most of the house is lit.

Kroenke1_thumb_medium : Gentlemen, please. We have something bigger to accomplish now.

BRADFORD walks in the door with JEFF FISHER.

Bradfordspecs1_medium : Hello, everyone.

Fisher_thumb_medium (FISHER): Hey guys. Mr. Kroenke, let's just get to it. Why'd you bring us all here today?

Kroenke1_thumb_medium : Because, gentlemen. You're all going to the future.

Bayless_thumb_medium : I AM ALREADY THERE.

Bradfordspecs1_medium : What do you need us to go to the future for?

Kroenke1_thumb_medium : Too save football.

ACT II

Scene 5

INT. DARK ROOM

GOODELL is sitting in front of a mahogany table. There are bodies everywhere. The air smells of pain.

Goodell_thumb_medium : And that, my friend, is what power really means.
Putin_thumb_medium (PUTIN): (smiles)

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