Well, hello there. Because it's Tuesday, and my Tuesdays are generally marred by nothingness in the form of few work related responsibilities...I'm going to try my hand at the ol' 53 man roster projection. I decided to add completely arbitrary nicknames into the list to spice things up a little bit, OLE! Also, I reserve the right to edit this list as we gain more info from the upcoming preseason games, but as of now, here goes...OH SHIT, EARTHQUAKESSSS!!!...Less quaking, more prediction making after the jump.
Sam Bradford AKA King Sam
A.J. Feeley (would love to see Thad here, but I don't think he has enough confidence from our FO just yet...2012 will likely be the year he supplants Feeley here)
RB
SJax
Cadillac Williams (Cadillac has been by far our most impressive back in preseason work to date)
Jerious Norwood (would love to add Toston, but due to WR and TE competition, don't think he cracks the lineup)
WR
Mike Sims-Walker AKA Skyy-Walker
Brandon Gibson AKA Gibby 2.0
Danny Amendola AKA White Chocolate
Donnie Avery AKA Wheels of Steel
Greg Salas AKA Sam Palas
Austin Pettis AKA Sweetness
Danario Alexander AKA The DX Missile
TE
Lance Kendricks AKA Sir Lance-A-Lot (methinks this goes quite well with King Sam)
Mike Hoomanawanui AKA Uh Oh (As of now, this nickname stands as more of an exclamation about his injury status)
Billy Bajema AKA The Ginger Avenger (can we please start calling him that?!)
Fendi Onobun AKA Autobahn (I think Fendi makes it based on his receiving work in Saturday's game and Uh Oh's injury history)
T
Jason Smith AKA Rodeo
Rodger Saffold AKA Big Smooth
Renardo Foster AKA Renardo Retardo (okay, this one is probably a little out of line, but it got me laughing)
Adam Goldberg AKA Leatherman
G
Jacob Bell AKA Bella J
Harvey Dahl AKA Big Nasty
Quinn Ojinakka AKA Ojinnaka Flaka Flame (courtesy of 3K)
C
Jason Brown AKA Logistics
Hank Fraley AKA Frank Haley
LB
JLau AKA Animal Jr.
Ben Leber AKA Leber 2000
Brady Poppinga AKA The Anti-Brady
Josh Hull AKA Joshtronaut
Zach Diles AKA Zachzilla
Jabara Williams AKA Jabara the Hut
CB
Ron Bartell AKA Stonehand Soldier
Bradley Fletcher AKA Fast and Furious
Al Harris AKA Predator
Justin King AKA King Cobra
Dionte Dinkins AKA Lil' Dink Dink
S
Quentin Mikel AKA Q
Darian Stewart AKA Sweet Water
Craig Dahl AKA Smashmouth
Jermale Hines AKA Ketchup and Liquor
DT
Fred Robbins AKA Freddie Freezer
Justin Bannan AKA The Bannan Cannon
Daniel Muir AKA Fat Tastic
Gary Gibson AKA 2Gs
DE
Chris Long AKA The Ultimate Warrior
James Hall AKA Daddy Fat Sax
Robert Quinn AKA Rookie Sax or Quinntesential
George Selvie AKA Skinny Sax
Eugene Sims AKA Dirty Sax
ST
Josh Brown AKA The Brown Bomber
Donnie Jones AKA Big Foot
Jack McQuaide AKA let's be honest here...this man needs no nickname.
Mardy Gilyard AKA Mardy Party
So...there you have it. This roster solves the WR problem by keeping Mardy Gilyard as a S/T specialist. Would the FO actually go for this you ask? Meh, I don't know, but frankly my dear, I don't give a damn. This my roster and I'll cry if I want to.
Feel free to add to the list of nicknames, there are definitely some weaker ones out there. Don't you dare touch "The Ginger Avenger" though!!
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