By popular demand (actually only Moy) my story cont'd.

What a great summer. Ozzy, Vince, Willie, Jack. Alas it would soon come to an end, and I had no idea what to do with myself. What, I'm going to watch episodes of M*A*S*H that I'm not old enough to understand? Golf? As an energetic young guy who didn't realize that masturbation had been invented, I needed another outlet.

Football seemed the obvious choice. Finding a team proved difficult, however. It could be the Cowboys, who because they were winning, everybody liked. That was out as I've never been a band wagoner. Same with the Steelers, although later in life, I have gained a great deal of respect for Terry Bradshaw. Only because he's bald. He sucks at everything , but he's great at being bald. I, of course, have no idea what that is like. None. I will not accept Hair Club For Men coupons, so don't send them (unless you really want to).

So, do the Cardinals have an NFL team? Why as a matter of fact they did. I remember very little about that first game I saw. I remember Neil Lomax and a fast receiver who I think was named Greene. I loved it, but even here in the midwest I never got to see them, because they sucked so bad. The game I did see was probably against a very good Bear, Packer, or Viking team.  Even so, I continued to watch the games through the Monday paper's boxscores. Suffice to say, that is not exactly the HD way to do it.

As I couldn't watch the team, and had very little info, my interest of course began to wane. Also, masturbation. Then, the football Cardinals took their ball and went to Arizona. At that point I lost all interest in the NFL. I was done.

Next episode: Homecoming, Tony Banks, continued self gratification....and somehow, I'll work in Fred Dryer.